Workplace Money Grab

For some odd reason, my co-workers always find a way to finagle me out of money. Yesterday was Boss' Day. The team I'm on works parallel with another team and each team has its own team leader.

"Here they go again." I mutter under my breath when I get the email, which shows up in the middle of our pay period. The folks on the other team want to collect money to get gifts for the two team leaders. They've even made a list of the possible Detroit Tigers ties they want to get for the male team leader, i.e. their team leader. Oh and they'll get something nice for our female team leader too, treating her almost like a second thought. I know the game they're playing. The gift they want to get him is expensive, so they think they'll involve our team to get more money.

Now I don't have a problem with the team leaders, I like them both and they're good people. I don't understand why they feel the need to collect money when passing an appreciation card around will do.  My coworkers ask for money more than PBS.

A month ago, we had finally had our pot luck, which had been delayed probably about five times. Now me, I go to work to work. If I want to bring a snack or something to munch on, I do that. I work a 12 p.m. to 9 p.m. shift, so I don't like eating anything heavy, otherwise I'll be sleepy and miserable for the rest of the evening. I'm also funny about pot lucks. Unless you let me come over and inspect and clean your kitchen, I more than likely don't want to eat your food. I've seen too many of my co-workers walk out of the bathroom without washing their hands and how do I know if you don't have animals at home that walk all over your kitchen counters? Call me a kitchen snob or anti social, but it's just me. Anyway, I was able to get away with not participating in the pot luck and I thought I'd have a reprieve before I was hassled for money again.

Over the past year several members of my team have lost loved ones, including Von's father and my grandmother. Our team has the routine of passing the sympathy card around and giving it to the bereaved when they return to work. Now the other team had a member who experienced a death in the family and they wanted to go all out collecting money for flowers and giving the remainder of the funds to their teammate. The members of the other team participated, but most of our team refused. No one collected money for us, so why should we give her money? Not trying to be funny, but the truth is the truth.

Earlier in the week, I got stopped by a couple people on my own team who want to have a Stuff Your Face At Work Day in the next couple weeks. These are the hungriest people I've ever met. We just had a pot luck only a few weeks ago. The only difference is that this event will only include our team. Why are we planning yet another meal at work? I don't come to work to hunt up food and I'm not really interested. I use a stall tactic and say I'll think about it and I quickly disposed of the emails pertaining to the event. Today I discovered the Stuff Your Face At Work Day falls on my off day, so they can eat all they want and I don't have to spend a dime. Though I know that the holidays are approaching and they'll be trying to set up yet another Stuff Your Face Day before the end of the year.

Getting back to Boss' Day; I ignored the emails concerning the gifts hoping they'll leave me in peace. Unfortunately they sent one of their bounty hunters out to gather more funds. I know how the game goes; I refused to participate in the pot luck, so she asks me face to face to pour on the pressure. They might as well have sent two mafia wise guys to pay me a visit because it's the same effect. It's one of those situations where if you refuse to cooperate, you'll have that stigma of being antisocial or uppity, not that I care what they think anyway, but I gotta work with these people everyday. Submitting to peer pressure, I say yes, but I won't have the money til payday.

Now before the money was collected, we got emails with all the details. Today when I come in, there are no mentions of the gifts, or what was even bought for the Team Leaders. Now I'm pissed. You take my money but you can't send a simple email telling me what I actually paid for? They got what they wanted from me so they don't need me any more.

Let me set the record straight; in no way am I cheap, I in fact have very expensive tastes. But it's my money and I like spending it on what I want to spend it on. I don't like feeling pressured that I have to spend my money on some stupid event at work, just to avoid being ostracized or fitted with the label of 'doesn't work well with others'. Yeah, I don't care what they think about me, but I want to get along with the people I work with. Like everybody else, I've got bills and other stuff I'd rather spend my money on. I know one thing: whatever they cook up for the holiday season, if I have to pay for it, they can count me out.

Are Manners and Chivalry Dead?

When I was coming up, my mother instilled in me and my siblings, proper etiquette and manners. Please, Thank You, No Thank You, Excuse Me, Pardon Me and all those other niceties are ingrained in my brain. There are some subjects that shouldn't be talked about in public. I'm by no means bragging but i also have the good manners not to belch, foul language isn't in my vocabulary (even though the characters I write use expletives at times), clean up after myself, and over talk another person. If you see someone carrying something, man, woman, whatever, hold the door open for them. Taking the lessons she taught me, sometimes I'm aghast when I run into people who don't follow the same code of respecting and being courteous to others.

This blog came about because I was at the movies earlier today to see The Butler with my mother and sisters. The lights are dim and the theater is playing commercials until the trailers start. Mom is in the aisle seat and I'm about six seats from her with my sisters in between. A woman comes up the stairs carrying popcorn, nachos, and a large drink and trips up the stairs. She falls and drops her food and drink. Are you okays are going all around and a guy comes down from above us and helps her. The bystanders recommend she replace her food, which she does. The man who I assumed was also a bystander is really her 'man' if that's what you want to call him, takes the drink and heads back to his seat. STOP the record.

Okay, it's bad enough that this poor woman was carrying all this stuff by herself, while the man who's probably snoring in her face every night is sitting on his butt, waiting on her to bring it. But the lady fell, probably hurt her knee and is embarassed and this Neanderthal sends her to get more food while he's relaxing in his reclining stadium style chair. Okay, he may not be the most chivalrous guy, I'll give him that. Go ahead and take chivalry out of the equation. Common decency would be for him to say: Hey honey, have a seat don't worry about it. I'll go replace the food. Needless to say, I was hoping she would take that as a lesson, get in her car and leave his trifling behind at the movies snackless. Unfortunately she did come back with new snacks. All I have to say is God bless her. Hopefully she wakes up one day.

That incident got me thinking about the lack of manners I see in people today, from the young to the old. I've been in stores sometimes and have some old lady just breeze right by me without so much as a pardon me. Or last week at the office I swipe my badge and open the door for some guy to basically try to bum rush me to get through. Hello! I opened the door for me, not you! There's the girl at the office who drinks pop all day and proceeds to belch out loud when the need arises. Okay enough of that! How about my coworker who sits at my desk when I'm off and leaves questionable hair on my desk and coffee rings? Nasty. Or I'm taking my break and overhear an overly loud cell phone conversation involving a boyfriend visiting a strip club, punching his girlfriend in the eye and her shooting him in the chest. Okay TMI. I do not need to know this.

Having grown up with my mother's lessons and going out seeing all this around me causes something of a sensory overload. Bad manners and poor etiquette are everywhere, making me grateful that I do know better. It doesn't matter if etiquette and manners are a thing of the past in today's world, I'm still going to hold myself at a high standard. Maybe me holding the door open for an old lady or saying thank you when the waitress brings my dinner will pass on the lesson.