Tuesday, June 4, 2013
Why Do I Feel Like a Drug Dealer?
The Body Hunters by Raven Newcastle http://www.amazon.com/dp/B009X971ME/ref=cm_sw_r_tw_dp_kkARrb04JYMQ1 … via
My customer gives me a barely perceptible nod across the room, like she's a pitcher at a baseball game. She's got that glazed look in her eye and I know she wants the 'product'. She's practically starving for it. The side effects are the same for all my customers; the sleepless nights, mood swings, and euphoria are what they want.
She leaves her desk and I make my move. With the 'product' in hand I pick up a notebook sitting on her desk and leave the merchandise up under it. I'm not worried about payment. She's a returning customer and I know she's good for it.
Like I predicted, she meets up with me at lunch and palms the money into my hand with out a second glance. Unless you were looking for it, you never would know that a transaction just took place.
This is how it is with all my customers at work who are begging for the 'product'. I've set up clandestine transactions in the ladies bathroom, the lunch room, and the trunk of my car. Whatever it takes to get my merchandise out on the street. I'm a born hustler.
If you think I'm talking drugs you're dead wrong. I'm talking about selling my book in the workplace. At some point someone at my job came up with this rule where you couldn't um..how did they put that? Distribute or solicit, whatever. It's a pain in the butt when you're an indie author.
So, I have my superfans who even now are waiting on me to bring contraband into the work place. It's not that I'm breaking the rules. The customers who have internet access go ahead and buy the book online. For those that don't have internet access and still want to support me, I purchase the book and give it to them at work. I'm pretty sure givesies backsies is legal. They're just paying me back for money I spent on purchasing the book, but I want to be off the boss's radar, so I'm stealthy with how I handle it.
One day when I'm sitting on Oprah's couch, we're going to laugh about this story. Until then, I'll be smuggling books in my purse for my clients who badly need a dose of drama.